A Good Laugh from Jay Leno, David Letterman and Conan O'Brien

AgWeb.com
10/2/2007 5:55:05 AM
A Good Laugh:

Jay Leno: “Oh, this Saturday in Washington, D.C., they will hold the seventh annual National Book Festival. First lady Laura Bush will deliver a speech about the joy of reading. And then President Bush will give the rebuttal.”

Jay Leno: “And, folks, it’s official. Congress now has the lowest approval rating of any Congress in the history of the United States -- 11%. In fact,” their “approval rating is so low, today they are invited to speak at Columbia University.”

Jay Leno: “And in Utah, polygamy sect leader Warren Jeffs has been convicted on two charges in” a “sex trial. … He’s going to prison, hopefully for the rest of his life. But the guy’s got 80 wives,” and “when Rudy Giuliani heard that he said, ‘Records are made to be broken.’”

David Letterman: “President Bush has a new plan to stop Iran’s nuclear program. … He’s going to have O.J. steal the plutonium.”

Conan O’Brien: “All the world leaders in town right now for the U.N. General Assembly. … Yesterday, President Bush met with President Valdis Zatlers of Latvia, and President Festus Gontebanye Mogae of Botswana and President Jakaya Kikwete of Tanzania. Yeah, yeah. Or as Bush calls them, ‘Buddy, Slim and Big Guy.’”

Conan O’Brien: “Yesterday, controversial Iranian President Ahmadinejad insisted that Iran has freedom of the press. He says there are 30 newspapers published there that oppose his government. Yeah, so, if you are keeping track, that’s 30 opposition newspapers and zero gay people.”

Conan O’Brien: “Ahmadinejad invited several high-profile reporters over to his hotel for dinner” last night. Apparently, “it went well, because this morning, Barbara Walters was seen leaving in the same clothes.”

Conan O’Brien: “The organizers of Hillary Clinton’s campaign are sponsoring a contest where the winner gets to watch a Democratic debate while sitting next to Bill Clinton. … The rules specify no members of the press and no fat chicks.”